Brutal Patagonian Initiation Hike

Since our four days of stumbling up and down the thousands of stairs built by the Incas in Peru, we have taken four bus rides, one plane trip and one very turbulent boat voyage to arrive at our first trail head in Patagonia Chile. This trek was to be a rather remote yet simple three day trip totaling 40 km in the Lakes District through farmland and rain forest. While it was indeed remote and beautiful as expected, the trek turned out to be far from easy thanks to a lovely native Chilean insect called the tábano.

Lonely Planet describes the tábano horseflies that thrive in the Lakes District for the month of January as a ‘nuisance’. I consider a neighbor’s dog barking all night long a nuisance. It is a nuisance when I hit every red light when I’m running late for an appointment. Hang nails, missing a bus, parking tickets… trivial and tolerable….these are all frustrations I would classify as nuisances. This simple misinterpretation of Lonely Planet’s word choice turned our simple first trek into two and a half days of physical and psychological torment at the mercy of the tábanos.

At the end of the first day, Zach pointed out that we looked exactly like Pig-Pen from the Peanuts.

We got our first taste of the tábanos as our boat was bouncily taking us to our trail head from which point the only way out was a three day walk. The bugs were the size of large bumblebees and perhaps even noisier as they buzzed incessantly around your body looking for a chance to bite you through your clothes. While the windy boat ride provided some solace, once we were dropped at the trail, they were on us and were not to be shaken. I initially managed to maintain some sanity as we made our way through a barn and some woods all the while with about five to ten tábanos swarming my head. During this time, we met Hector whose family owns property along the trail and would turn out to be a complete savior.

 After about 25 minutes we came to a clearing of pastures set against forest and mountains. I think it was beautiful, but all I really remember is the tábano count escalating to about thirty ‘nuisances’ buzzing and biting, swarming and terrorizing. And then I went completely mad. I clumsily ran, flailed my arms, and screamed seeking out refuge from the incessant harassment in the forest. I was that crazy person in a swarm that I've mocked in movies. When I finally stumbled into the forest, it didn't stop. They were still all over me, buzzing and biting, and would be for the next three days.

When Zach reached me hyperventilating and spewing expletives in the forest in the fetal position, he helped me pull it together. We came to terms with what would be our less than pleasant trekking companions, covered our bodies from head to toe (even though it was 80 degrees) for some bite shielding and plugged into our iPods to drown out the relentless buzzing. While hiking as fast as possible listening to NPR and TED talks is neither of our ideal versions of our first Patagonia trek, it kept me from running off a cliff or into a river in ridiculous panic. Additional challenges came on the suspension bridges that were extremely rickety, requiring balance, total focus and slow steps. It was a very serious test of mental control for me. I had to let them swarm, land and bite me, or risk falling in the river. I may sound melodramatic, but the threat felt very immediate.

Trying to keep it together.

Tábano defense: iPod, bandana, hat and sleeves. And you're still probably screwed.

While we had packed camp gear, we were more than happy to dish out the extra $30 to stay at Hector’s family’s Hospedaje de Callao. Zach and I agreed that he could have named any price and we would have eagerly consented for shelter from the tábanos for the night. We ended up getting far more than shelter, as we got to spend the evening speaking with Hector and his brothers about their land, animals and the farm. They also shared their homemade bread, butter, cheese and milk, all of which were delicious supplements to our packed food.

Hospedaje de Callao. Precious sanctuary.

View of Volcan Puntiagudo from the hospedaje.

Beginning of day two. Eleven miles to go.

One of the many awesome farm pets. I almost stole this guy to give to my mother. Almost. Don't worry Dad. Still on the farm. You're welcome.

Another fun swinging bridge without side rails.

Bandana in hand for constant swatting.

Appreciating a rare break from the bugs to enjoy the setting and a veggie pita lunch.

Day two was a brutal 11 miles again accompanied by the loyal horseflies. Thankfully, we managed to find a boat that saved us from a third day of being bug chow, and immediately started making plans to get to a completely new region of Chile. 

Now on a ferry far, far away from the tábanos Zach and I laugh at our, let's call it 'character building', first trek and unexpected initiation to Patagonia. Hopefully now that we've paid our dues with the tábanos, it will be a smoother ride here on out.